Giant Flies Invade Norway

Oslo, May 2 - In an incident that has scientists everywhere baffled, giant flies have entered the country of Norway and taken over by force. The flies, weighing between 5 and 7 pounds (2.2 to 3.2 kg) entered in the night, and by sunset had gained control of Parliament, the city's police stations, and all major grocery stores. It is unknown where they came from and what their future plans are, but most citizens aren't taking any chances by trusting these unfriendly invaders.

The only serious opposition they faced during the invasion came from hardware stores, convenience stores, and tanning salons, all of whom banded together with the signing of the Treaty of Paris, signed at Paris' Hardware near the center of the city.

As these groups were coming together, various sources claimed that the invasion was nationwide, and state that the flies have met much less resistance in other areas of the country than here in Norway's capitol. The biggest insurgent attack of the past 24 hours occurred shortly after 5am with traps concocted of tanning beds, rotting food, and insect spray. Although the traps proved moderately successful, the fighting only succeeded in keeping the existing opposition alive and forced the flies to seriously consider the threat posed to them.

By about noon, both sides were worn down by the fighting. Hundreds of fly corpses lay scattered in the streets, among the bodies of those insurgents who had been picked up and dropped 10 stories by the roving fly patrols that have been set up. All national services were canceled, as were schools, universities, jobs, and private recycling services. The nations economy, which depends on oil for sustenance, was brought to a halt by the day's activities, while the krone traded poorly in foreign markets.

At 7pm, both groups agreed to meet and seek out a peaceful resolution. This was a big break for the humans, since that time of day is when the flies are strongest; however, many have criticized the humans for the concessions that were made. Some are even refusing to agree to the terms of the 2007 Oslo Accords, as they have been named, because of the clause giving only 3/5ths voting rights to the humans.

While the future of Norway remains uncertain, both sides are optimistic that an suitable agreement will be reached. Until then, most people have decided to hide in their basements. Said one scared resident on her way home, "Why would you be outside? I don't know who these flies are, where they have been, what diseases they could be carrying, or why they want to take over our nation. I know just one thing... nothing like this has ever happened before. And that is the biggest reason I am scared."